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Friday List: 10 Frightening Fast Food Menu Items

August 10, 2012

I don’t eat fast food very often, and when I do I’m pretty picky.  I do eat at some of the following restaurants, but sometimes their menu items make me question why I continue to do so.  Here are some of the most disturbing menu items I have found….

1.  McDonald’s: McRib

The McRib has a cult following (I always think of the episode of The Osbournes where Jack gets so excited, saying “McRib is back!”), and I don’t understand.  It’s formed meat.  Formed meat.  Let those words sink in.  It’s FORMED to look like meat with bones in it.  But there are no bones.  They serve something that looks just like McRib in school cafeterias, and I always wonder if they are manufactured at the same facility.  You won’t catch me eating one….

2.  McDonald’s: Chicken McNuggets

Again….formed meat.  And I’m not even sure what the “forms” are.  They look like boots, and hourglasses, and some other weird things.  The texture on the inside is barely meatlike.  I used to eat these things all the time, and now I’m like, WHAT??????  I’m not sure where my head was then.  (By the way, I don’t eat McDonald’s.  Not at all.  I have eaten there once since 2007, at an airport, for breakfast.  My choices were…limited.)

3.  Taco Bell: Doritos Locos Taco

It’s a Taco Bell taco on a taco shell shaped nacho Dorito.  Now, given my Dorito affinity, you might think that this would be appealing to me, but it isn’t.  For one thing, Taco Bell (like most fast food these days) gives me an earache (I suspect MSG or one of its, ahem, glutamic counterparts may be to blame)…but for another, there is just something unsettling to me about a taco shell coated with orange nacho-flavored powder (actually, I’m starting to have this feeling about Doritos.  That’s big, my friends.).  I wonder who came up with this idea.

4.  Taco Bell: Volcano Taco

It’s a taco in a spicy red taco shell.  A spicy RED taco shell.  Since corn isn’t red, I’m going to go ahead and assume that there is artificial coloring involved here.  I am not sure at what point it was decided that if a food was spicy it has to be red.  Pointless.  Just pointless.

5.  Hardee’s: Grilled Cheese Bacon Thickburger

Now, I’m not going to lie.  A lot of things about this sound good.  It’s a burger.  With bacon.  On a grilled cheese.  Three things that I love.  But wait….it’s not on A grilled cheese sandwich.  It’s between two grilled cheese sandwiches.  I’m pretty sure Hardee’s is just trying to see how many heart-stopping items they can put on their menu.  Overkill, I tell you.

6.  Burger King: Memphis BBQ Pulled Pork Sandwich

It’s not that there’s anything particularly disturbing about the sandwich itself….it’s pretty much just a barbecue sandwich.  But something about a barbecue sandwich from Burger King I don’t really understand.  Sorry.

7.  Krystal: Scrambler

There are many variations on this, and none of them sound appealing to me.  Breakfast meat (sausage or bacon), scrambled eggs (I do not eat fast food eggs.  In fact, I never have.  Ever.), and various other items (biscuits & gravy, pancakes & syrup, grits, American cheese…).  You “scramble” it all up together in the cup and eat it with a fork.  It’s been around for years, but I’m just not buying it.  Literally.

8.  Wendy’s: Dave’s Hot & Juicy 3/4 lb. Triple

This one blew my mind.  Three quarter pound patties and three slices of American cheese on a buttered bun.  A buttered bun.  Except I honestly wonder if it’s buttered (I don’t know if that term is “regulated”. It would not surprise me to learn that it was more like a margarined bun, but I have no proof of that…).  Oh yeah, there’s some lettuce, tomato, onion, and pickle on there.  Because vegetables are healthy.

9.  Subway: Steak, Egg, and Cheese

Really, anyway Subway item with eggs.  As I mentioned above, I don’t eat fast food eggs.  Subway’s eggs are the most disturbing, though, because you can see them in the table while they’re making your sandwich.  They’re discs.  Discs of eggs.  Philip ordered a sandwich with egg on it one time.  They asked him if he wanted “white or yellow”.  No thanks.  I’ll pass.

10.  Sonic: Cheese Tots

Okay, I’ll admit….it’s not the actual food that’s sooooo disturbing here.  I mean, lots of people love Sonic’s cheese tots or their chili-cheese tots.  I can’t blame them.  I love a good tater tot, and I like cheese on pretty much anything.  My problem with this item is the picture on the Sonic website.  It’s a pile of tots with a square of American cheese (sort of) melted on top.  Very squarely.  Not appetizing.

I have no doubts that there are many items that I missed that are equally frightening, or perhaps more so.  Do you have anything to add?

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Filed Under: Chattavore Chats Tagged With: lists, writing By Mary // Chattavore 11 Comments

Lupi’s Pizza Pies (Hixson)-August 1, 2012

Nitty-Gritty Café-August 11, 2012 *****CLOSED*****

Comments

  1. Jenny says

    August 10, 2012 at 6:56 am

    The Bacon Bacon Biscuit at Hardees...canadian bacon & regular bacon...I like bacon & that's a whole bunch of bacon. And I'll say, the cheese tots at Sonic.....oh man...so bad it's good sometimes.
    Reply
    • Chattavore says

      August 10, 2012 at 7:33 pm

      That certainly is a whole lot of bacon. I don't count Canadian bacon as "bacon" though, so..... :)
      Reply
  2. Kelly Hereford says

    August 10, 2012 at 9:07 am

    I agree with all of these! I especially agree about Subway though. They have convinced people they are healthy but I'm not buying that! I get really grossed out by the meats all sitting out together glistening under the florescent lighting. I can't do it. I just can't.
    Reply
    • Chattavore says

      August 10, 2012 at 7:33 pm

      Now that I have read your description....I may not be able to do it again either!
      Reply
  3. _emily_rose says

    August 10, 2012 at 10:20 am

    The only one I disagree with is the Doritos Locos taco. The nacho version currently on the menu does not sound appealing to me, but I've heard rumor of a Cool Ranch version, and I will be all over that like white on rice. Some things are so bad they're good. I'm with you on the formed meat though...I have never even had the desire to try a McRib.
    Reply
    • Chattavore says

      August 10, 2012 at 7:31 pm

      I totally get the Dorito appeal...but something about them wrapped around a taco just doesn't appeal!
      Reply
      • Ginger Terrell says

        August 12, 2012 at 11:42 pm

        I've had the Doritos Locos taco and it's not too bad - just tastes like Doritos with taco stuff - ha! Go figure! You'd do just as well to buy a bag of doritos and make your own Taco salad with all your own fresh ingredients.
        Reply
        • Chattavore says

          August 13, 2012 at 4:12 pm

          I don't eat Taco Bell anyway, so.....
          Reply
  4. Jensen says

    August 10, 2012 at 1:55 pm

    For me Jack in the Box and Burger King take the cake with their bacon milkshakes for truly over the top foods.
    Reply
    • Chattavore says

      August 10, 2012 at 7:32 pm

      Jensen, I'm not going to lie. I've made ice cream with bacon in it. Somehow, though, the idea of homemade ice cream with little bits of high-quality bacon in it doesn't quite have the same gross-out factor as the items you mentioned....
      Reply
  5. Ginger Terrell says

    August 12, 2012 at 11:40 pm

    Cheesy Cheddaburger from Wendy's - I had one today out of sheer hunger because I was looking for something cheap cheap (99 cents) and had never tried one. It reminded me of an oversized Krystal burger (which I'm NOT a fan of) and it had their melted cheese on it (the cheese they serve with their fries). Hey, I like Wendy's from time to time - but I just felt like this burger was kind of weird. But that's just me.
    Reply

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About Chattavore

Hi, I'm Mary! Welcome to Chattavore, a destination for people who want to feed themselves and their families well every day! Life can be crazy, which means that getting dinner on the table can be a challenge (more often than not!) and my mission is to take all your favorite recipes and figure out how to serve them on a Tuesday.

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